a dad and his daughter

i heart holland on ice.
i never knew winters were so lovely.

the reason why i haven't been blogging...

idfa: international documentary film festival amsterdam

The largest documentary festival in the world with 200+ films being shown in 10 days! Over the last two years I've enjoyed watching films during this festival, so this year I decided to volunteer and took the position as Zaalwacht...It seemed like a great opportunity to get out of my normal circle of people, stretch myself in speaking Dutch, and have the opportunity to see the films for free!

I could seriously become addicted to watching documentaries. It is one of my, or perhaps even the most favorite genre of film. It combines so many elements that I LOVE! History, current events, social justice, culture, imagery...and most importantly: story-telling!!! And as documentary becomes increasingly experimented with and accessible to a wider range of audiences, they're also become more creatively and intelligently done.

Documentary is full of paradox: reality mixed with fiction, live shots with also some dramatization, and intimate portrayals of ugliness that exists in our world along with signs and glimmers of beauty and hope... Although I saw many heavy films highlighting current situations in Burma or North Korea or Liberia... I was not entirely saddened or depressed from watching these films. Instead I saw people coming together who were fighting for peace, justice, and freedom...choosing to love and forgive and work in unity together towards something better despite the horrible circumstances and oppressive regimes in which they live. I was reminded again and again of how privileged I am to live in such freedom: freedom to speak, (freedom to write anything on this blog, for one thing!!), freedom to vote (and for a democratic state!), freedom to live a healthy and good and full life, freedom to work... I could go on and on. We have it so good.

I was so inspired by these films and wish I could post about each one! Each film told someone's story and this is what fascinates me more than anything: Our love of story as human beings! We just can't get enough of it! We love hearing story after story...And film captures this so powerfully! Even more interesting was having the opportunity to hear from the filmmaker in first person, ask questions, and come to a deeper understanding of why they chose to portray these particular stories. Why would they dedicate 3-5 years (sometimes much more!) to telling this one story out of all the hundreds of stories to be told? It was so interesting for me to listen to these filmmakers share their vision behind the film, the inside information of how it personally impacted them and therefore they were compelled to turn it into a film.

I was also stretched on another level: putting all my study of the Dutch language into practical use. This is the first kind of 'professional' type position I've had speaking Dutch! It was awesome to be working almost entirely with a Dutch community of people (ironically at an international festival) because so much of my world is with internationals both whom I work and study with, so our common language is usually English. It was very reassuring to have my manager instructing me and giving directions in Dutch and then being able to immediately respond and know what I was supposed to be doing. (Although I had my doubts at times!)... It was a good learning experience!

For all these reasons it was well worth the time... but I'm now catching up both needing to get more sleep and doing normal everyday tasks like a big pile of laundry in my closet!

paris under an umbrella: part I

hope is...

Hope is a such a precarious thing.

It depends on so much. It is birthed in expectation of something more. For something better. For something good. Hope requires risk. Hope requires effort. Hope often requires the experience of pain. Hope unfulfilled will leave you sick and heartbroken.

It is often conceived by the intangible imagination. It is the beginning, the very foundation and stuff that dreams are made of. And I'm afraid, it is one of the greatest of all things. For without hope, we die. Without hope we have no reason to live. Or at least life becomes meaningless, empty, dry.

I find hope in the small things. The meeting of eyes with a child who passes me by. A sweet smelling flower, although it's gone in the mere passing of hours. I find hope in a hand written letter from a far away place, and a dear friend as the sender. I find hope in a new song, telling the old expression of love, over and over again. I find hope in the rising and falling climax of a personal story. I find hope in a friend's forgiveness, when I've been stupid and blown it and can't seem to get it right.

But all these things are only glimpses of something much greater. Something that lasts, something that cannot and will not disappoint. When all else fails, when the things I've found hope in have long passed, have lost their wonder and faded into the background. When those dreams have been dashed and broken into pieces that won't repair... there is still something that will not let me down.

It's unfailing love. This is where Hope is Alive.

It's a love that gives when I cannot give back. And 'gives' is an understatement. It gives unto death and a horrible, ugly death at that. It's a love that is not dependent on me and what I do, it's a love that just is. It's waiting for me at all times. It only needs to be recognized. The Giver and Source of this love wants to be seen. This Giver will never disappoint. The Giver of hope beyond all hope is Jesus.

...Over the summer I was browsing the internet, or rather I was browsing the website of Compassion International... It didn't take long before I found the picture of child, whose name was written in the description as "Naomi from Kenya"...

You see for several years now I've wanted to go to Kenya...I've dreamed of doing some heroic thing. Maybe working with orphans. Maybe helping women start businesses through micro-loans. (These dreams are pregnant with hope and bringing hope to others!!) When I saw this picture of this 8-year-old darling with whom I share the same name, I was immediately bursting with love. Hope was in her eyes. I gave in (with not even a hint of reluctance...) and now we both share the hope of one day meeting each other. While I know I will probably fail her in some way... I at least hope to bring her more hope and point her in the direction of the Hope that is and always will be alive...

Hope lives!

the world anew

Written on a wall in the Kröller-Müller Museum:

Edward’s journals frequently explored and tested a meditation he seldom allowed to reach print; if all the world were annihilated, he wrote...and a new world were freshly created, though it were to exist in every particular in the same manner as this world, it would not be the same. Therefore, because there is continuity, which is time, ‘it is certain with me that the world exists anew every moment; that the existence of things every moment ceases and is every moment renewed.’ The abiding assurance is that ‘we every moment see the same proof of a God as we should have seen if we had seen Him create the world at first.’

Perry Miller, Jonathan Edwards

...I find this fascinating. Just as the subject of a photograph can never be the same thing twice; You could take a picture in the exact same spot, but it will always be different. New lighting, new settings, new figures, new arrangements, new shapes and new movements...the renewal never ends. The creating never ceases.

on this day in history...

It was strange for me to go to my home group tonight, knowing that I was the only one who had voted, as I was the only one who could vote...and I did send in my absentee ballot two weeks ago by the way. So it has already arrived and been counted. Patricia and I had our own personal election day : )

...I'm now sitting here on my couch watching the election update, flipping between the CNN and BBC channels on my TV. The first polls will not close for another 15 minutes, which happens to be midnight Amsterdam time. Meaning, the last polls Alaska time will not close until 7 AM my time! I'm not planning on staying up all night to wait for the results of election, I just wanted to get a taste of what is going on... It's so interesting to watch things unravel from this side of the ocean. Europeans are fascinated by the American political system and of course, this election in particular. While traveling to Paris, I noticed how every front page news article, every magazine cover, and posters hanging around the city were centered around our election. One magazine article I saw in a European magazine was even entitled "Who will become the next world leader?" I've even heard of parties being held for the election around the city, and being hosted by Dutch people no less. Our political system is a spectacle.

The world is watching. The world is waiting. Do we really realize as Americans how this election will have an impact on the entire world?!?

Something that boggles me is what it must feel like to be a presidential candidate during a time like this...hours from knowing whether or not the responsibility of president will be falling on your shoulders. I read this fascinating article on the super-ego of would-be presidents in the New York Times yesterday: The Mindset in the Middle of the Storm Read Here. Wow. To be that kind of person who is willing to take on the presidency, especially in a time of such uncertainty and instability. It's absolutely crazy insane (!!) and also incredibly admirable to think that there are people who have the courage to take on such an enormous task as caring for our country.

As everyone is asking, I join along ... how will this day go down in history?

hello, australia!!

It's always fascinating for me to check out my stat counter to see who has been visiting my blog...I always wonder, who on earth could that be? out there in Canada? Brazil? Gent? Portland? Seattle? Chicago? ... and Qatar?! Who are you? what is your life like? why do you find it interesting to look into my life?? But there are always a handful of hits that I know exactly who it is...

That one arrow pointing all the way over in Australia... Arienne, I know you're out there!!! Hello! I miss you! Won't you come back to Amsterdam soon? How dare you regularly check out my blog without commenting ; )

Arienne is a dear friend of mine, a true Dutchie who has been traveling the world since May. She's made her stops in the States (including attending Francis Schaeffer's L'Abri in Massachusetts, seeing me while I was in Colorado and several stops in California) the Cook Islands, New Zealand, Australia, and finally she will end her travels in Thailand before making her way back to Amsterdam: She's so Adventurous!!... Amsterdam is not the same without her here : ( This picture was taken in Denver back in July. We had eaten breakfast at the Egg and I before I said goodbye and sent her on her way to Salt Lake City by train...sigh.


As for the rest of you...Who are you? I'd like to introduce myself, "Hello! my name is Naomi."

paris, je t'aime

Eva and I took a little vacation adventure to Paris this weekend...while there was a lot of getting lost and having to engage in the art of turning around, we also had a lot of fun twirling around as well: whether it was underground as we walked to the metro or under the Eiffel Tower... I took an over abundance of pictures (500+!!!) in a few short days, so tune in because there is much blogging material to come!! I'm really excited to share some of them with you...including a series of shots of Paris under the umbrella, and 10 random things done under the Eiffel Tower! ...